Today, we want to say thank you to all Mother’s; Mums, soon to be Mothers, Mother figures & Mothers that are here with us in spirit.
This Mother’s Day, we have asked all of the incredible women run businesses, that we support within KKJ; how they navigate motherhood, what the day means to them + favourite memories they have.
Why is mindfulness so important, as an expecting mother & mother?
I see the transition from Maiden to Mother as a metamorphosis; a profound phase of development in a woman’s life. When a baby is born, so too is a mother. Both mother and baby are fledged into the unknown, a new world whereby together they need to navigate the experience. We expect the baby to grow at a profound rate, as they open their curious eyes to life – but we don’t tell women enough, that their eyes too will open to life at the same rate their hearts expand to fit new profound love inside.
This is an astonishingly intense journey of growth, where I believe the practice of Mindfulness is imperative for the well-being of the Mama. I truly believe the repercussions of this will be positively felt not only in the family unit, but in society at large.
Each stage of Motherhood brings with it a myriad of complex and challenging experiences, which calls for us to practice certain virtues pertinent to Motherhood (in a capacity we have never known before). Things such as Patience, Balance, Connection with our children, Integrity, trusting in ourselves, and most importantly - allowing ourselves to tap into our intuition. I think the practice of Mindfulness enables us to align with our intuition and stay present on our journey; breathe deeply when we need to, lean into each moment, get through the challenging days and with more ease, create a sense of gratitude, and even build more mindful relationships with our children and partners.
I encourage every pregnant, new, or seasoned mama to start simply, but simply start. Remembering that both Motherhood and Mindfulness are a journey; not a destination.
What is the most fulfilling part about being a mother?
Becoming a mother has allowed me to be reborn in many ways. The opportunity to curate someone’s life and make it as dreamy as possible for them is surreal. I lost my own mother six years before becoming a mother myself… having a girl first allowed me the opportunity to recreate the deep connection I had with my own mother and give back all that she gave me. Children are our greatest teachers; they show us the work we need to do on ourselves to constantly grow and better ourselves. I love how quickly they move through emotions they can be crying one minute but dancing and laughing the next, its so fluid and makes life more fun.
Ariana is mother to Aurelie and Julian Martz in New York City
How does a parent agree on the perfect forever name for their baby? & where do they start?
I do think one of the hardest things that comes with the naming journey is agreeing on the perfect forever name with our partner. So often one parent will absolutely love a name or have a name idea they think will be 'the one', all too often to be vetoed or rejected by the other partner. It can make the name journey seem overwhelming or daunting, but there is light at the end of the tunnel I promise!
I have actually written a little guide called 'how to find your baby's forever name'
which is available as a free download on my website. I created it to help on your naming journey and put together a list of helpful guides for you to use.
One of the guides I talk about is the importance of how to 'keep a list', where I ask you to write names down. a hundred names, two names, names you have loved since you were a child, names your partner may suggest even if at first you do not like it, write them all down. Look over your list one day to the next. Your opinions and views may change and overtime something may ‘feel right'.
And remember, that the naming journey can be a fun one, try to remain light-hearted about the process, have fun with it and try and remember that in the end your child will become the name you gift them.
Do you have a daily mantra when things get tough?
“I am not a mantra user myself; I think my brain knows that I am making it up (trust me I have tried)! Instead, I dig deep into my self-care toolbox. On any given day that looks like looking at the Astrology for the moment, some EFT tapping and recording my gratitude’s on my phone. I find these practices pull me back in line. My children need a happy and healthy Mother, and this is how I get through the storms and the sunshine.”
What would be your advice for a new mum?
My advice for a new mum... don't hesitate to reach out for help whenever you need. Don't feel guilty about wanting to take care of yourself. Know that you are doing amazing.
As mothers, can we really "do it all”? How do you manage being a mum, being creative & running your business?
Oh, I don't and more often I feel like I can't, or I'm not. It is so easy to get caught up in the comparison trap. A constant question of am I doing enough?
We expect the world of ourselves and I'm sure it's entirely impossible for us to do it all. That's part of the unpredictable nature of motherhood, the never-ending battle between fast and slow, stillness and the rush of a journey so impossibly mine and still wildly out of my control.
I've learnt to ask for help, to let go of some of the responsibilities, to delegate and allocate my time. I'm a better mother because of it.
Some days the guilt is all consuming, but I choose to let it melt away. I love, I play, I fight for what I believe in and I work especially hard because I was given this beautiful, chaotic life and I don't plan to waste it.
What are some of your non-negotiables for self-care as a mother? Is it time alone? Little rituals?
It’s alone time - it’s that sleep in on a Sunday, coffee, music, incense, and time to take it slow. It’s so important to ensure I make time to invest in my overall health - F45, surfing and ensuing that I have some fun also!
What is your favourite mum hack?
I always keep a notebook and a pen in my handbag in case I end up having to wait in a queue or at a cafe with my 4-year-old (who’s very impatient) that way she can sit and draw, and I don’t need to give her my phone!
I’m not much of a mum hacker really, as I’m pretty unorganised in most of my parenting but this one has saved me many times!
What is your most favourite memory with your Mum?
When I was little (and Mum would want me to add on a very special occasion), Mum would pull me out of school on a rainy day and take me into the city for lunch and cake. We would walk around in the shops and spend the day together and it would make me feel like such a grown up! I always remember getting all dressed up and Mum would make me feel so special - on a dreary rainy day I always think back on this memory.
What does Mother’s Day mean to you?
For me, Mother’s Day suddenly had such a greater meaning when I became a Mother myself.
As soon as I gave birth to my son; I realised how much a mother sacrifices for their child. I had a new appreciate for my own mother & what she has done for myself & my brother & for all of these years.
Mother’s Day is such a special day, to celebrate, appreciate, think of & thank Mother’s for everything they do.